I know, I know, it’s already February and actually way too late to post the second part of my annual recap, but hey – better late than never, right? And yes, there’s still a lot to say about the last year, probably the most amazing one of my life so far, because it taught me so much and helped me become the person I was struggling to be before my transformation started back in 2017. 2018 was an important year, a year of change, a year of new challenges and new things to experience, a year as single and embracing that fact. And oh, I really enjoyed checking off things off my bucket list! It was fun and it was exciting and I wish I had new ideas for 2019, but my brain won’t come up with something – at least, I still got some points left from 2018 and will try to turn them into memories! But here comes my → #SingleBucketList2018 recap!
Let’s start my recap of 2018 with the part that has gotten me through the year at any time: music. I’ve done this for 2017 and feel like sharing my favorite tracks of the year again, since music means a lot to me and it’s a big part of my life, even though I don’t play any instruments. Music soothes my soul, it’s something that’s always there and the best companion through every occasion – good ones and especially bad ones.
Like last year, I will be saying something about a few songs of my playlist and there may be some nice little stories!
This year, I listened a lot to music in my car while driving around, so many of the songs remind me of certain trips and when I listen to them, they kind of bring me back to special days, so I’ll share my memories with you for some of them. Feel free to listen to my favorites on Spotify, but for those of you who don’t happen to use it, I’ve also created a YouTube playlist (you can find it at the end of the post). I hope you enjoy my choices as much as I do, they really mean a lot to me. ♥
Photo: Jacqueline Filmore
Well, I already mentioned it shorty in my December recap – and it’s clearly a story that needs more explanation. It’s not a pretty one and it definitely puts me and my character in a bad light, but I had no other choice, except for the one of giving up and even though I had to be the bad guy, the real asshole in this story, and it wasn’t the nice thing to do, it was the right thing to do.
December – what an exciting last month of 2018! And luckily, the month that saved my whole year, since I finally found a place to actually stay and settle down without an expiration date. When I moved back to Hamburg in July, I stayed with a friend but our agreement was that I can stay until December – funnily, she kind of threw me out one month earlier and I had to move in with a guy I was dating for only almost a month, in order not to be homeless (which is bad enough alone, but don’t forget my poor baby – how are you supposed to live on the street with a cat?). Not so fun fact (and I was actually saving this for my next #TTGU post, but it has to be told so you can understand the whole situation): I didn’t want to be with him anymore. I felt so bad about doing that selfish move, living with someone just for the sake of having a home. I felt like a proper asshole. But the relationship was really bad, it didn’t work between us and actually made me sick. Like really sick. Mentally and physically. I had to leave as soon as possible! But it wasn’t that easy – since I only had this mini job at the store, I didn’t have enough income in order to rent an apartment. Plus, my cat was always a problem for other people. But I finally found something at the beginning of December and – thank God! – it happened, and I found the nicest little room in an apartment I’m now sharing with two more people – but perfectly located in one of the nicest districts of Hamburg. And my cat is with me. Seriously: that was my Christmas miracle. I moved in on December 21st and couldn’t be happier. Even though I wasn’t able to visit my parents over Christmas and New Year’s Eve because nobody could take care of Spucki and I didn’t want him to go through hell on that 600km trip through Germany, just for a few days. So I spent Christmas and NYE alone, since both of my flatmates were up and away with their loved ones, and even if it was kind of weird (my first Christmas alone and without internet, which was the worst part of it – no Netflix!), it was absolutely okay.
So this was my happy story of December. There was also work and I met some friends, but also spent some evenings alone, out or at home, and I am genuinely happy. I thought the end of 2018 was gonna be really rough, but it ended perfectly and New Year’s Eve was such a relief, I actually cried for an hour straight, because I was so happy it was finally over. And now there’s 2019 to conquer. Let’s go!